Getting over a long-term relationship breakup. Advice?
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Getting over a long-term relationship breakup. Advice?
I dated a guy for almost four years, from the end of high school until almost the end of college. We went to different universities, so much of our relationship was long-distance. We had a decent breakup and I understand that we don't feel ready for the next step: marriage. However, it has been really tough on me. We broke up almost 9 months ago and I don't feel like I have moved on much. Is this normal? He was my first serious relationship and love, and parts of me felt that he was the one I'd marry. Last weekend our mutual friend was married and seeing my ex at the wedding was really tough.I don't really know what I'm asking - maybe just looking for advice. I want to deal with this in a mature way, because I already found that trying to date other guys (no matter how attractive! ha) doesn't help - if anything, it just makes it worse.
Just find things to replace him with. Read a book, get into a series on DVD or go spend a day at the beach with family. Keep yourself as busy as possible and talk to someone without overwhelming them with it.
Don't go all crazy slashing tires and shit go home, drink a lot, smoke pot, do whatever it takes but please channel it inward and effect yourself only cause dragging everyone else into it is rude...... too much drama there are a bunch of guys out there fish in the sea etc etc
well, time is #1, im sure you know that. lol and also friend time for sure. get out alot, never have a boring day, girls night out is fun, have some days planned for you and relax, book a cheap spa and get pampered, theres nothing like feeling on top of the world, but dont go out spending tons of money. it makes you feel better but after its not good lol. forget about relationships for awhile and focus on friends and family. you'll bounce back soon.
It's entirely normal to feel a longing for a person you spent so much time with. It takes time, but any steps toward healing are improvements. Dont push yourself to heal instantly, just allow yourself a little more each day. And especially dont let friends or family pressure you to heal any faster. Over time, you will find you no longer feel a desire for him.
Time will take care of this. Don't be in a hurry to replace him. I was in your shoes, once. I went with a gal that I was just so sure I'd marry. She later broke it off with me, and I thought I'd get over it quicker by dating other women. As nice as they were, I was wasting their time, and mine. I would think of"Michelle"when I was at the movies with"Rhonda", or at a dinner party with"Lori". Time is what really works the best. Good luck to you.
Yeah its deff. normal. I mean four years is SUCH a long time. So my advice for you is not to keep such a distance away from your ex becasue it will only make things ackward when you see him agian also dont be BESTFRIENDS with him becasue it will make it harder to not love him. So you should just live your life even if it is hard, and who knows maybe when you guys meet up agian you both might be ready for marrige. Hope this helppss
the way you feel is completely normal. you obviously cared for him. Nice that you have tried dating again, shame it didn't feel right. Maybe if you concentrate more on other aspects of you first ie.go on a weekend tip, visit old friend, whatever. When you are ready to date again if will come to you, its not a matter of'how long its been'its a matter of when ever your ready, take your time. It'll get easier.Best wishes
hi i know it is very difficult to break up with some one that you love but some times it is better to break up then living in heal life so you broke up almost 9 months and he did not try to return or call so i think he does not deserve you and you have all the time to find that man that appreciate you for you.best of lock and life goes on.
The first one is usually the toughest to get over. Your feelings are normal you invested time out of your life that you will never get back. Take time to reflect on the positive parts of the relationship; these thiings will help you down the road. You should also look at where you went wrong in order to avoid these same pitfalls later.Time does heal all wounds but, we never know individually how much time that takes. It sounds to me like you will be fine. As you bury yourself into everyday life more and more the pain and sense of loss will become more distant. Keep your chin up and know that this will pass.
gosh have/had a problem kinda like thiz ...date other guys sumtime does work help you take your mind off them ..i found ways to not think about him at all avoid things that we did together gettn rid of all his things or things that reminded me of him ..me knowing that he was seein other ppl sumtimes helped me out ..also talking to him jus keepin in contact ..no talkin or being around each other at all works alot ..i felt like i was gonna die without this guy ..but i opened my option and went after things that was better then him !!!!
well me we were neighbors. i don/t know why. every time i come over. then we start to argue every time. ok we didn/t stop and think. we broke up early. i was upset about it. i couldn/t go to my prom. i don/t hold a grudge. now were talkin. asked god to help ya.
i understand, i think you should try to not think about the past and try to think about how maybe there is someone out there who is better than your ex BUT if you can't stop thinking how you feel about him, why don't you tell him...he might feel the same and i mean what if you two were meant to be together,although i do believe in destiny and you might not be meant to be together but you should talk to him...i think one day you will find that one person who is meant for you, just keep searching, there are plenty of fish in the sea.
it's tough in the beginning. but you'll see that all you need is time and you will move on. try to think of the bad things about him. i know its wrong but it may help you forget about him. it may not help either but hey its worth the try. just keep dating other guys chances are you will find"the one".
unfortunately, only time will help you now, sometimes, lots of time! If you can just take the good things about the relationship with you and focus on what you learned, you have to file the guy away, and try to forget what might have been. Start being comfortable being single, your never alone, and one day you will meet someone, and the only thing you will think of your ex is,"thank goodness I'm not with him!"There is someone so much better in your future.
Honey, that is normal. There is no easy answer. Everyone moves on at their own pace. You might have to just ride it out. You do have to try and do things that make you happy. You could just date casually to get out. Just tell the guy in advance that you're not looking for anything serious at this time. You don't want to be cruel. This way there is no pressure on you. You will eventually resolve this in your own time. I am like you in the fact that it takes me a long time to move on. Others I know bounce back faster. It's all okay! Goood Luck.
Life just keeps sneaking up on us while we're making other plans! I'm sorry you are feeling sad...and agree with others here that time will heal your pain! It is important to begin busying yourself in your daily life. Find new interests and continue to develop old interests. Plan and carry out activities with other women, as well as your family. Dive into your career. The more interests you have...the more interesting you'll be! While there NEVER is another FIRST love, new love is out there....and twenty years from now, you'll be looking at your first love with fondness and a pleasant slew of good memories! Good luck and God bless!
Getting over a long-term relationship breakup. Advice?
