Friend Advice, does anyone have any?

Esme · #1 (**permalink**) 12-25-2008, 10:26 AM

Ok, well my friends, One named ashley, and the other monica. Monica moved away so now im with ashley. Ashley has been acting different, like, now whenever i ask to go to lunch with me, she blows me off for a group of people that love to get into trouble. Cindy, (My best friend) is wondering why. Ashley tends to come to lunch with us on the rare occasion, like her boyfriend and her are fighting or something, and now we aren't talking anymore. i really do love her as a friend, but i need advice. I feel like im her BACK UP friend, the one she trust, but never wants to be with. But the group of people, is the ones she CANT trust. What should i do... Should i like be like, well if your going to treat me like that then whatever i don't care, or should i tell her how i feel. Honestly, whenever shes with me and Cindy, shes always bored, and i don't want someone that's not having a good time to be with me. Im confused..

Mander, · #2 (**permalink**) 12-25-2008, 11:59 AM

yeah i would be honest with her. There is probably a reason why she's acting the way she is. Let her there you will be there for her when she needs it but she can't just run to you when her other friends are unavailable. Let her know that it kind of irritates you.If she doesn't like the options you give her then tell her it's that way or nothing at all. Tell her it's not fair to you.

letterstoheather · #3 (**permalink**) 01-02-2009, 01:30 PM

From what you said, you ARE her back-up friend.Yes, let her know how you feel... she doesn't seem like a real friend at all.

deeromper · #4 (**permalink**) 05-15-2009, 09:04 PM

be straight up

jetaimejepense · #5 (**permalink**) 05-20-2009, 02:12 PM

i've been on both sides of this situation.only once has it been true though.try talking to her about it.but be nice about it because if its not true it hurts your friendship.it does sound like youre a backup friend..but it may not be the caseshe just may be coping with something else and acting weird from it?its definitely happened with one of my friends.dont let it get to youand when you're calm, talk bout it.try gathering examples so you can point out what you meanbecause if she isn't doing it on purpose, she'll atleast know when it comes off that way.good luck!hope i helped =)