What can I do to help my friend whose dad commited suicide?

Sam B · #1 (**permalink**) 01-02-2009, 01:51 PM

I dont know what to do... She wasnt my best friend, but she was an okay friend.... I dont know how to helpI just feel so helpless.... I am going to the funeral tommorow and I dont know what to expect.. or what to say... Do I send flowers? They are living in a hotel because they dont want to be at home so would flowers be a pain? Do I send them a sympathy card? Do they make cards that sayI am sorry that your dad was such a (colorfull adjective) that he left you, your siblings and your mother all alone so he could feel better? Gah I wish there was a book that had this in it.

abbycrombie07 · #2 (**permalink**) 01-05-2009, 06:22 PM

oh hun I'm so sorry...all you really can do is be there for her in her time of need, don't be to like are you okay need help that sort of thing. maybe make a meal for the family to help them out, that's what me and my family do. all you can do is be supportive and just be a good friend, also if she isn't in counseling, then you might want to inform her but not soon maybe later.good luck and hope the family is wellGOD BLESS=D

Ash · #3 (**permalink**) 01-06-2009, 07:43 PM

Just be there for her if/when she is ready to talk. Having a loved one commit suicide is one of the worse feelings in the world, and until you've been in that situation, you cannot know how it feels. Personally, when my friend killed himself, I just needed some time to be alone and cry. I'm now getting to the point where I want to talk about it a little. Please don't feel bad or rejected if she just wants to be alone for awhile. It is a very confusing, depressing, stressful time and everyone needs to deal with it in their own way.In Addition:Just go to the funeral, tell her you're sorry for her loss, and inform her that if she EVER needs someone to talk to, you'll be there for her. The funeral is very difficult as well, and again, just let her come to you if/when she is ready. If you want to make her a card, go for it. And just put the same old"Sorry. I'm here for you"-type stuff.

Crystal · #4 (**permalink**) 01-07-2009, 05:20 AM

I'm sorry to hear about that! When this happened to my sister (her boyfriend did it while she was on the phone with him), there wasn't a lot we could"do". Just be there for her! I know my sister hated it when people looked at her with those pitiful eyes too...Oh yeah, and keep her away from crowds of people that have been drinking excessively. They tend to ask very personal questions that can spark some anger in your friend.Good luck to you and your friend!