My friend thinks a relationship will solve her problems.?

My good friend S. is pretty depressed and she believes that the only way she will be happy is if she is in a relationship. I don't know what to do to help her! I am 27 and in a healthy, happy relationship, and she is 23 and single and miserable.I have tried telling her, repeatedly that she has to be happy with herself or she would just sabotage any relationship she were to get anyway. I try telling her that I wish I had worried less about it at her age and just lived life with my friends and getting myself together instead of obsessing over what I didn't have. I have given her the names of income based psychiatric help in our area, but she says she still can't afford it. She see's me being so happy now and so it's hard to make her believe that I had to be happy alone before getting into this relationship. I just don't know what to tell her anymore and she is ALWAYS bringing up how miserable she is, but won't take any advice. I just hope that someone out there has dealt with this before. When I was depressed a few years back, I sought help and dealt with my insecurities, but she just refuses. So now, I am out of patience and find myself drifting off into space when she goes on her daily rant about not finding someone and that there must be something wrong with her etc. That's not the kind of friend I want to be, but I just don't know what to say. She is a very pretty girl. She is a little on the heavy side, prolly a size 16, but I am a 13 and no better looking than her, so I know she can be found attractive if I am. But no matter what I say to her to try to make her feel better, she just blocks it because"no one else thinks so, or I wouldn't be alone"How do you deal with this! Of course she is still single with this attitude. The kind of men that want broken women are the ones to beware, and I have told her before that being negative about herself isn't a good impression to make. I don't say anything condescending or mean, I am very caring when I talk to her about it, but then all my ideas are shot out of the water by her negativity. HELP!I've tried introducing her to new friends to fill her time, suggested new hobbies, make regular hang out times, and nothing will do, she is obsessed with a boyfriend. We are in a small town with no volunteer options or groups to join and the only shrink is an hour away and I have tried to get her to go and said I would go too... but she just makes excuses.

You are VERY right about her needing to be happy with herself than with anyone else. This world can really set us up for let downs, it is important for us to be independently happy. Your friend seems to be behind a thick high wall at the moment. She see's NO OTHER sights of happiness except in being with another man. I see this all too often. Most of the time it is a woman that is unhappy in her relationship and she just bitches and moans about what she should do but then she just stays with the guy, or dumps him and then finds another guy and has the same issues. Anyways, your friend needs to have a wake up call, a revolution. Ask her,"what would happen if, assuming there is a God, He came down and told you'you are destined to NEVER be with anyone again, but I will show you other ways of happiness if so you desire them'"What could she really say to that? Perhaps it will make her think, maybe it will giver her the epiphany that she needs. I was like this also when I was younger, one day I woke up. Yeah, I'm single, but I'm 25 with loads of friends and I am happier than I was when I was in a relationship. This area, to her, is very dark and scary though. She probably has never been there. And yes, seeing you with your guy probably reflects the only means of happiness to her. She should probably see others that are not in relationships that are very happy, as happy as you at least.You can not reach the point of destructive stress though with this issue. We can not change ANYONE, they can only change themselves. I would tell her to read the bible, the book of Corinthians, Mark, Galatians, and all the epistles of Paul. They helped me VERY much. Good luck to you.