Healthy Relationship AdviceMany say that love is the most common cold. From being overly consumed with someone, to being blatantly mistreated we can be ill in love and not even notice a sign. We may not be doctors but we can prescribe you with healthy love advice to make sure your relationship is strong.
I'm in a serious relationship with my boyfriend of almost 5 years. We started dating at 17, and i'm about to turn 22. He is the only boyfriend i have ever had (although he has had many previous relationships). Before him I was too shy to even talk to guys, he's really my first everything.Everything in our relationship is fine, we have no major issues, we rarely fight, we have a lot of fun together. He is great on paper too; successful considering his age, steady good paying job at one of the country's top companies, lives on his own, still takes night college courses. In other words, there is nothing wrong with him. And we are totally in love. He sees a future for us, talks about how we are gonna be together forever.The problem is that, as much as i love him and this is a healthy relationship, he's still my first and ONLY relationship.In the past year, all of my friends have ended their relationships, so i spend time with my friends going to out and we often meet guys. I've never met anyone I would even conider leaving my boyfriend for, but i'm still jealous of how exciting the single life seems.I also always wonder about what else is out there. I feel like there are some what ifs, and such. I never saw myself in a serious relationship at such a young age.So, I need your advice. Am i just being swept up in what seems like an exciting single life, or am I just being unrealistic? Is it worth ending a perfect relationship? Or will I always have this"what if.."thought at the back of my head, like"what if I had other relationships?"... Do i end it on not??
I was out there and I have to tell you, there aren't too many guys who treat you well and look good on paper. Really, there isn't. I met my husband and have not missed what's"out there"even a little bit... I wouldn't walk away from what you have for"curiosity"... he may not wait around for you... and what's out there may never measure up to what you lost...
If you are thinking about what other guys are out there, it is probably time to let it go. You probably still really like him, but if you loved him, you wouldn't be having these thoughts. You're right: you need more experience with guys because you've only have him as a boyfriend. You never know what you could be missing out there. Tell him you need a break, and you both need to see different people. If you realize that it was him all along, you can get back together and never have to worry about wondering the rest of your life if he was the one you wanted.
The single life is NOT all it's cracked up to be. Casual sex now gets you a big, fat STD, and people are way too concerned with it. Remember how shy you were to talk to guys five years ago? That hasn't changed, not really. Do you want to return to the life of"hi, um, my name, um, is, um..."?If you're considering leaving a perfect relationship, I don't know that you really love him the way you think you do. I understand the feeling of not experiencing everything, but all you're missing out on is heartache. The chase can be exciting, but those feelings die down really quickly and you're left searching for that perfect relationship all over again. If you already have the perfect relationship, why throw it away so you can try to find it again?Try this: go out for a drink at a bar and have your boyfriend hit on you and try to pick you up. You can make it as easy or as hard as you want to; heck, you could even go home alone and leave him hanging! That's what the single life is like -- the roleplay allows you to keep your monogamy and experience a hook up at the same time.Trust me, as someone who spent years living that exciting single life you dream of ... I am blissfully happy to be entering into a mortgage with my boyfriend. I like the stability, the love that we share, and yes, even the fact that I know his sexual health history. Not very romantic, but I'll take him over hoping for something better any day. The grass is not always greener on the other side.If you are seriously considering leaving him so you can have casual sex, you need to talk to him ASAP. He is not making you happy, despite what you posted in your question. And he needs to know that.
If you came to think about these things maybe there are to things to take into consideration. 1) Is he really the one you want to spend your life? 2) Is single life really that interesting? I am almost 30 and I cannot tell what would be the best for you. I've always been the last to abandon a relationship, but you really have to think these through. If it works fine for you, maybe you should stick to it as long as you have it. I spent 6 years alone after a longer relationship and there was nothing impressive about it. So you still have to ask yourself whether you choose a safe but calm bay or the dubious unknown.
Aaah...too much, too young!You're definitely better off with him than not! Just listen to how much single people moan about it...it's human nature to never be happy...the grass is always greener etc etc.The single life does look fun, and it is, until you find"the one"that is. You'll never find anything better than a stable, happy relationship...and familiar sex is always better too, you know what buttons to press, how to turn each other on, what works.You're really lucky to have found something so perfect at such a young age and you really are not missing out on being single!If it's the excitement of sex with another person that makes you yearn for the single life why don't you try role play? I do think you need to inject some"spark"back into this relationship...set aside one day a week to go on a"date"with each other. It will be fun and you can try new things together, maybe go bowling one night or to the cinema. If money's a bit tight you could just go for a walk or a drive and see where you end up.Perhaps you could take up classes together like cookery, wine tasting or pottery? ~ Might be fun!The secret to a long and happy relationship is to treat it like a new relationship, remember that feeling of not being able to get enough of each other! )
in the end...everyone always wants to find their true love. think about it that way. single is fun but only for so long until we become lonely, frustrated and then desperate for someone to cuddle with. i can assure you- the single life is not as great as it seems. ages 15-18 i dated a new guy each year...we were kids and the boys were jerks. at 18 i decided i didnt want to be in a relationship...i wanted to be single and have fun. it wasnt as fun as i had hoped. when i turned 21 i was going out to the bars and meeting plenty of cuties. great time! guys took me out to dinner, to the bar, to play pool and just hang out. i had a ball for about 4 months...and the i met this one guy. he was so sweet...funny and i just felt safe with him--physically and emotionally. long story short...i dropped those other guys for him. its been a year and 5 months now and im so happy. so my point is..i would drop that lifestyle in a heart beat to be with a good man...a man i can see a future with. those guys are hard to find--i say dont give it up. but you sound as though youve talked yourself into wanting this. if youre going to go thru with it--tell your bf the truth. maybe he will understand and give you some time...and then you guys can be tgether again. but it usually doesnt work that way. i wish you good luck. and hopefully you wont break this good mans heart for the single life...because ultimately--its not a fair trade. take care :-)
no don't end it tell him what you told us what is it with people and talking maybe he is open mind do some swinging have a open relationship invite some mate around get some toys have a mixed sex ann summers party use your imagination and live some fantasies together for christ sake what you waiting for. Being single stinks!!
Just because your friends are single and out there - doesn't mean they are happy or that they don;t envy what you have.I felt the same way with my first girlfriend-no together as long, but... met while I was in college - we fell in love, never argued, everything was great, got engaged and then... I felt like I was falling out of love - 5 months before the wedding. Not sure - thought I could do better or have no problems finding another woman since this relationship progressed so smoothly - biggest mistake of my life and I've regretted it for the last 27 yrs - meeting new women was still very hard for me, eventually married someone else - not for the right reasons, more because no one else was asking, I was 30 yrs old..., now divorced 10 yrs-after 7 mostly unhappy yrs, still don't have much luck meeting women, will probably wind up alone the rest of my life-don;t break up because you're friends"seem happy"- that's them, not you - you are happy
Should I end this serious relationship or not?
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