Please help need some good advice, Ive done something stupid but I love my Dad so much.?

kttphoenix · #1 (**permalink**) 07-12-2010, 07:34 AM

Looooong story - in brief.....parents splitting up, unhappy marriage for years, Dad suicidal at points recently as feared he was ruining everyone life....he is in love with woman at work who won't leave her husband.....she is pestering him when he has said he cant have contact right now as things are too confusing and whats the point if shes happily married....he was going to councilor today and was taking her emails with him....I wanted him to talk about the suicide, the house, my parents splitting up.....not her stupid pestering

So....I did a bad thing. I emailed her at work, threatened to tell her hubby she was having an affair if she didn't leave my Dad alone. Now I wouldn't mind if they got together, I'm not being protective of my mum or whatever. She knows. I was just trying to get some breathing room for my Dad who is struggling to cope with everything that is happening.

Advice please......did I do the right thing (pretty sure that's a no!) and should I tell my Dad.....she might? I know he will be mad, and feel betrayed for going behind his back. How do you think he'll feel?! Do you think she will tell him?

Ms Pollyanna · #2 (**permalink**) 07-16-2010, 07:34 AM

I would've done Wat u did!

Po!son P!nk · #3 (**permalink**) 07-19-2010, 07:34 AM

I would feel the same. Already your dad has enough pressure to make him feel suicidal, and she's just adding into it. It's not fair to anyone - especially you and your father.

This is something you may want to tell him but tell him at the counselor's office. I'm willing to bet they already know too many things are going on and it's not just some silly woman at the office bothering him. Having someone there will help. He'll be a little angry, first at you for doing what you did and second because he'll think he can handle everything. As for the woman at the office, I wouldn't care if she said anything or not. Frankly, if she was pushing my already suicidal father over edge - it wouldn't have been an email.

mr m · #4 (**permalink**) 07-23-2010, 07:34 AM

Maybe your dad needs something you can't give him(sex). But falling for a women that is married isn't good, in my opinion you did the right thing because what if she told your father out of nowhere it's over i don't love you and I'm not leaving my husband? That would cause him to be more suicidal. Maybe you can find him someone nice. Every man needs a woman.

nycybergal · #5 (**permalink**) 07-28-2010, 07:34 AM

your dad shouldn't have another relationship outside his marriage anyway and if he wanted another relationship why didn't he break up with your mom?
TB i Wu have done the same thing as u and does your mom know about this?

daveirw23 · #6 (**permalink**) 08-02-2010, 07:34 AM

While I feel bad for your dad, he did bring all this drama on himself by his own poor judgment and indiscretions. I can't help wondering why your mother's feelings haven't been considered. She's the real victim. Having said that, I believe you deserve a huge Congratulations for stepping up and dealing with a situation that's become too huge for your dad to adequately deal with right now. Kudos!