I'm in love with a woman who WAS separated - but now let her husband back, help?

I'll start by saying I"m a complete total mess. Absolutely devastated over this. I've been friends with an old ff from high school from nearly 17 years. She's is an unhappy married with a 3 & 4 year old. A year ago we were talking and things were getting very close as he marriage was crap. She threw him out and I backed off completely, giving her space and didn't want to "push up" on her in that situation. A week goes by and she takes him back and I didn't go back to chatting with her. Fast forward a year. I just say hi to see how she's been, and marriage is even worse, she's on the verge of throwing him out. This time I don't back off. We started talking real serious. Then we started seeing each other a couple of times over the next 3 weeks. Yes we slept together once too. She said she was kicking her husband out after the holidays anyhow so I went for it. I liked her a lot. The second the holidays were over, she did. she kicked him out and I was basically there. We dated very intensely for the next 2 month. We lived together. I also have a child with me on the weekends. Our kids would play when we did things together and they played so well. We spent just about every night together in total love. Everything was my dream come true. Literally my dream. I used to dream about being with this girl many years ago. She also happens to be everything I was looking for intellectually, physically, financially. I mean PERFECT to what I was looking for. The situation, no, but her yes. This past Sunday her husband when coming to pick up the kids cried and cried and got into her head. At least that's how I see it, and then by Friday, she tells me she's going to give him 1 last chance. I mean no warning at all. I slept there every day up to the day she said he was coming home that night. Now here's where it gets F*&KED up for me. I am totally in love. I KNOW she loves me. She tells me. Even though she took him back, she still allows the hidden line of communication. I feel she loves me. She tells me she has to at least give it 1 last shot because it is her marriage and the kids are sad their dad isn't home. I know, seen this a million times. But when I talk to her when he's not around, I can still hear it in her voice she loves me but she has to try to make it work. And yes, we have stopped seeing each other. We're just talking very minimum right now. I just love her so much and it's SOoohto let go. We lived the past 2+ months as if we were going to get married in 2-3 years... maybe not literary, but you know what I mean. I guess I'm just in a real crummy place right now. Totally heart broken and it makes it a million times worse that me and her didn't fight, that she says straight up that we are great together and she'll never be as happy in her marriage as she is with me. but she has to try. This just totally sucks. I know I'm being a wuss, but I have never felt heart break like this before. I have never been happier in my entire life and now it's all stripped away instantly. Do I pray her marriage doesn't work out and they break up on their own. You bet I do. Not because I want to see her marriage fail or her hurt, but so I can make her happy the way she deserves. OMG I sound pathetic. None the less, it still FY*king hurts. I have thrown up about 10 times in the past 2 days, and I NEVER throw up. and I haven't eaten anything in 4 days. I've tried but no appetite at all. Maybe I'm just venting here, maybe I'm looking for someone who was in a similar situation and they tell me the girl and husband split up on their own , they got a speedy divorce and she came running back to them and they lived happily ever after. Don't worry, not banking on that one, but sure the hell wouldn't mind it.

I guess any comments, advice or feedback may help.
I would have never thought yahoo would be a place to help me with this, but I thank you all, your comments are very helpful.

I can understand how you feel about her. I was in a similar situation over a girl I really, really, loved who got engaged to another guy. I know that stabbing feeling in your heart when you think of her. But you know what, back in those days, I thought I would NEVER get over it. Guess what, I did, and it does not even hurt when I remember that girl now. For now, you should make such an outcome your objective (not saying this is going to be inevitable, it just helps to be prepared mentally).

The bottom line though is that you need to do what the others suggest. Give her breathing room for now, and just stay out of her way unless she contacts you. If you do this, it will make her decisions that much easier. In the end, if she does decided to keep the other man, you can at least be comforted in knowing you did not destroy her marriage and her kid's lives. If she takes you in (which is a real possibility), then you can rest assured you got her the right way.

I hope this helps. Just hang in there. Patience is the key here !