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2 days ago I asked a question on this, I'm not going to go into it now because it's long and confusing but the majority of people answered the question thinking that I had feelings for my best friend, I thought about it for a while and I think they were right..I just want to know how I can get over her?
I think I might have to give a little more info first.
So me and my friend have been friends for about three years. I didn't know she had feelings for girls until one day, about two years ago, she said that she really really liked me and kissed me. I didn't know that I was a lesbian (think I was in denial) until that moment when she kissed me, I got all tingly like I had never felt kissing guys. Obviously we started going out because it just felt right, we were on and off for about a year, the relationship was really stressful and we fought a lot, in the end we decided to end it because it was too painful, we both hated fighting but it seemed like we just couldn't help it.
We continued being best friends, which was hard because we were both so in love, and so we slipped up a few times and gave in to each other. It was basically like friends with benefits I guess.
Recently, however, she has come out to one of her friends (no one but me had known that she liked girls). My friend told the girl that she liked girls and was a lesbian and felt lonely and wanted to get some hot lesbian girls for herself. Her friend suggested that she went to some gay bars.
Now I must make it clear, I don't want to be in a relationship with my friend which is the confusing part that I need help with!
I offered to go with her to a club, as I too was curious, I still don't know what I am..bi, straight, lesbian
So I went to a club with her and I set her up with a girl, they made out and that was grand.
The next night however is the problem. We went to another club, my friend found a girl herself, left me alone ALL night to make out with this girl and then comes to find me at the end of the night to tell me that she was leaving with the girl (I was staying in my friends house that night as I live far away from the city) she said I could share a taxi with them to go home.
I was after a few drinks and I just started crying. Non stop crying. I was alone all night so this might have something to do with it too (?) but I knew that they were going home to have sex and I just couldn't handle it I was hysterical. Needless to say, the girl got a bit freaked out and got out of the taxi..I felt so bad for being a cock block..but also relieved that she had left. I'm not going to stop being friends with my friend..we've tried that and it doesn't work for us at all.
I'm sorry that this is so long but I really need help with my situation. Any advice would be really really appreciated, I feel so down about everything ;-(
Thank you guys
If you care about this person, you have to tell her how you feel -- there's nothing else to it.
"Faint heart never won fair lady", or so the saying goes. It doesn't matter whether it's a guy or girl, gay or straight or whatever. What if that person is The One? You want to spend the rest of your life looking backwards, filled with regret over what might have been?
You have two options and you have to toughen up and pick one. There are NO other options.
Tell her you still have feelings for her and you want a real relationship.
Stop seeing her entirely.
You're screwing up her life by stopping her having a relationship with someone who is willing to have one. Until you're ready to have a real relationship with her, you should stop seeing her as it will only be more painful for you to watch, and harder for her to have a real relationship instead of waiting for someone who, in the end, might not even want her.
Still in love with best friend?...help me :-(?
