I need helpful advice...i love my wife but not in love..i stay so i dont disrupt my c

I'd say to try to fall back(?) in love with her and if it doesn't work, split up, you shouldn't be unhappy, if you work things out right your kids will be fine, just make sure they know it's not their fault and that you love them.

Do her a favor and leave if you're only in it for the material aspects. Sounds like you're living off of her so get out there and get a job. Plus, staying in a marriage for the kids is no marriage.

I'm in the same boat, as a stay at home mom. your kids will see if you're happy or not. if you're mostly unhappy you need to leave. if you're only unhappy a bit, talk to your wife. either way you should talk to her and let her know how you feel.

dude i know how u feel Ive been in Ur shoes , i can help because i was marred once i felt the same way but never the less i got honest with her . email me and will talk and don't worry I'm
only trying to help............mact600@yahoo.com

If you are unhappy your children will feel it, and it does show even though you may not want it too! Maybe you and your wife need to take a break and find each other again.

You're right about the things money can buy and they don't bring happiness. Love brings true happiness, love and comfort, when you have lost the comfort with each other....you ask yourself where is the love.

Get someone to stay with the kids and go somewhere ALONE, that means where you two can really be alone. No outsiders, take a canoe trip or camp out in the woods, find yourselves....

I sometimes feel that my husband is with me cause of our baby. Honestly if he felt that way I wish he would tell me. He tries to convince me that I'm nuts but I can't help the way I feel, but anyways back to your question-I would tell her-let her find someone who loves her and isn't living of her. poop or get off the pot

is she happy with who she is? this is usually the case when someone feels they have lost their attraction for somebody. I would bet she is not happy and you should try and figure out why.
Remember never to be rude or belittling because she is your equal and you aren't above her in any way. Also try and think about why you are not attracted to her. it could be that you both just have different interests and want two different kinds of lives. If this is the case then you must move on.
the children will be happy if they know they are supported and loved by their parents
REMEMBER to listen to your heart. your heart knows the answer always and is never wrong

If you had feelings for her once it is possible for you to get them back again. You need to go to marriage/personal counsel ling and figure out what it is that made those loving/romantic feelings subside/stop. Once you know the answer to that you will be able to find a way to get those feelings back.

Aside from that, try and spend time with her doing the things just the two of you used to do when you first got married to try and re-ignite the sparks.

And yes, it is worth the effort...too many people these days don't take the 'til death do us part' marriage vow seriously enough!

If you have young children especially, do what it takes. If your children are in their late teens or are adults, they will understand your decision if you choose to opt out, unlike younger children. But I think you should put in the effort.

All the best.

Good man. Stay there for the children. Stop having more ha ha and stay for them until they are at least mid teens. Then they will understand. As for You and Your wife. Why aren't you happy? If you can't fix this problem. Then your wife will probably be willing to split ways with you, to make you happy. If I were you, I'd stay faithful too her, and just be there for her for as long as I said. And, then if you're still not happy, ask her to let you go. If she can't, then You really did cause this, and shouldn't leave her hanging. Do onto others as you would want others to do onto you.

hello you seem like a nice guy,, and it's great that you're working through you're feelings before you just up and go. One thing I do know for a fact is that it never works when you stay for the sake of the kids, my mum did that and we knew she was sad and so we suffered,still to this day i wish she had of left when we were much younger. Money does not buy you happiness you're very right there. Does she know how you feel? Maybe if you talk to her you guys can work through this together...maybe some time apart to work your head out .. My bf recently went through something similar but he had issues with his ex he needed to work out,, he just needed some time alone and he came back to me.. whatever you do follow your head in this one i think and everything will work out for the best.

My father used to say "don't marry someone you can live with, marry someone you can't live without". My father was a wise man. Always be there for your children no matter what you decide, regret is a heavy bag to carry. Be happy.

EVALUATE your employment situation. If you're not employed and not looking for employment, do you need to be? If not, then you need to be keeping the house clean, the dinner on the table when your wife gets home, and all the clothes clean. Learn how to make a mean souffle! (It isn't hard.) After dinner, be the one to clear the table and wash the dishes. You're still the husband, and love, many times, has to be a DECISION THAT YOU MAKE, not a feeling that you hope will come your way. This is especially true with a husband and wife. Make it easy and desirable for your wife to want to love and respect you. Do something special, just for her, and DON'T remind her of how much trouble it was. DON'T wait for her to do something special for you as a "payback" for it; do something ELSE special, just for her, before she gets a chance to respond. NEVER keep score; as long as you are going to hang in there, you need to be doing "110%" effort to make the marriage work, and to help your children grow up in the best possible environment.

work Thur your feelings with some help from these folks:

http://couplesrecovery.com/

your kids will feel the bad vibes even if you stay, just do it formally and ex plaint to your kids that there not to blame for the situation and star looking for a love that can make you happy, and also understand your situation with your family, good luck.

I will commend you for staying for you children, but you know that children are very intuitive and they can pick up on the unhappiness and then their lives will be disrupted and not only will you be unhappy but then the children will be unhappy. If you really want to work through your feelings I think you and your wife should get some couples counseling. maybe start having a date night where you can go to the park and walk hand in hand. Something has to be done or you will begin to resent your wife and children because you will think I am not happy why am I here and then the children will pop into your head and that is when you might think to yourself I wish we wouldn't of had these kids cause they are whats holding me back from being happy. So if you want to be happy you need to get up and take a long look in a mirror and get a plan of action and follow through with it. Tell your wife your feelings she maybe having the same feelings that you are without communication between the two of you, you will never get this resolved.

can you not ask your own questions without trying to ask the same questions that i ask i dint know what your problem is with me buddy but i dint even know you and really dint care for your input on my questions specially when you dint know the situation if you only knew all the details you wouldn't have answered the way you did but you know what your little sorry ass comment does not bother me cause I'm a better person than that to be belittled by your sorry ass comments therefore you do not bother me in the least bit. the only reason I'm wasting my time writing you is this is the second time you have copied my questions so get your own questions I'm sure you can get something out of your pebble small brained head.....im so sure your wife is a truckdriver and makes 130,000 dollars a year come up
with something else ppulezzzee(please)

spend more time with the kids find fun and interesting things for them. Find more time to please your wife with the simple things. Stop worrying about what you can get from your relationship and focus on what you can give. stop being an A$$ hole, stop bitching about stupid $hit. and stop trying to find love on the net, give up pulling the monkey your going to f-up the keyboard.

Lots of people seem to provide you with their views and options its now depend what's on your mind to visualize out the facts.

Many times we always overlook the happiness we had till the day we lost it by then you will start to realize what's the real meaning of happiness.

I had a friend who's mum always by his side providing him whatever needs and cares but he doesn't feel appreciate at all. He told us that the mum treated him like a child and at times she will grumble when he came home late.

I ad viced him that she grumble you because she care about you. Everyday when you go home, the dinner is ready for you how much love she had showered you just that your mum didn't know how to expressed physically to you. He replied that no matter what, he's unable to feel the warm or love from his mum.

Then one day her mum was contracted with cancer and is in the last stage. He started to get panic and worried but not long after her mum passed away. At the funeral he cried like a baby over her mum coffin, I tried hard to comfort him. At this point I always remember him saying these words to me:-

"I've really regretted what I had done, I didn't realized the love my mum showered over me, I didn't even gave him a single care or love but she never complain. Now there wouldn't be any more meals ready for me when I got home. No more grumbling from her whom now I needed the most. My dear friend please don't follow my foot steps remember to treasure your loves one before its too late."

I hope through the experience my friend went thought will give you a better picture and judgment. We need to live simple to know the roots of happiness. We are humans and we had the ability to change situation. Nothing is impossible between a relationship is whether you want to make it happen or not.