marriage problems please help.?

Maybe he thinks you won't like him chatting with her. So tell him you know and tell him it is OK.

don't tell him Obviously it bothers you if you are thinking about it and hiding your feelings. let him tell you and see where it leads. But i think its pretty obvious it bothers you

Kelly if you would remain silent then this my escalate to something that you may regret later on. the secret is how you would com front your hubby do it w/ love hey when threes a secret threes a reason.

If you don't mind, why is this worth discussing? He may be assuming that you don't mind and there's no need to tell you. He may also be contemplating cheating on you, in which case ignoring the problem will not fix it. He's your husband, just talk to him.

best thing in a marriage to do is open up communication lines rather than being afraid of saying something that may upset your spouse. it's best to be upfront and honest. if something is bothering you, tell him rather than letting it nag at you. I'm currently in your shoes right now so i understand what you're going through.

ignore it like you never knew they're just friends.she has her new life and he has his.

Find a time, where you can be uninterrupted, and ask him in a calm, non accusatory way, what he thinks about married people having a private relationship with other married people. His response to the question should give you a clue of what he is thinking about his relationship.

Based upon his response, you can ask him more detail about his beliefs of philosophy about extra marital relationships. You will find out what you need to know.

After obtaining an understanding of where he is at with this and if you are not satisfied with his answer, you could then confront him with the information you know.

From a guys perspective....just tell him that you know he's been talking to her and that you dint care, if he gets offended then threes probably something going on, if he's understanding then he'll stop

Just ask him, if he is doing nothing wrong he will not get upset or angry, if something more than chatting is happening he might get upset. He may not have told you for fear of your reaction, jealousy, anger, resentment. Talk to him that is the only way you are going to get to the bottom of this and good luck

homonym, tough one. tell him you ran into an old flame the other day who asked for your email so the two of you could start conversing and that you told him no, because you didn't think it proper to open that door and that you could never risk your marriage in such a flippant fashion and see what he says......

be very nonchalant.

well unless your insecure with yourself I whodunit give it to much thought.on the other hand it sounds fishy He hasn't told you, Ide say he'll be tapping it soon if he hasn't already

If he's hiding something like that, it's a sign of breakdown in the relationship for one reason or another. I would encourage you to confront your own feelings by being open with him about what you know and attempting to understand his reasoning behind the secretiveness.

Don't tell him you know. He will get all upset that your "reading" his mail. Just let him tell you...or not. Start chatting too...get her email Addy and ask her out on a lunch date to discuss their need to communicate behind your back! or better yet...ask her hubby!

Kelly...I looked at some of the other questions you have asked on yahoo...you need to talk to him and get things straightened out or move on with your life. I don't really think you are okay with his chatting....and I cant say that I blame you....get all this stuff sorted out...life is toopoom short to live the way you are.
Best of luck

Start with casually asking him who he is chatting with... see if he lies to you. You don't have to listen to anyone about what's okay or not. If you don't like it, you have every right not to. If it doesn't bother you, and he doesn't lie to you, then I don't see a problem. If he lies, or you simply don't like it, then you need to tell him.

Let it go. I never let stuff like that bother me.
Sometimes its just comforting to talk to people we grew up with.
Unless he starts comparing you to her or commenting about her in a way that is putting you down, I would ignore it.
He'll tell you when he feels like. Do you have the type of relationship where he would always feel able to tell you things like that. Do you flip out about stuff or are you jealous.

Men don't communicate if they feel hassled, so make sure you don't, Let him have his secret for now. Do you share everything with him?.......

Reverse the situation, what if it were you chatting with an old boyfriend, what would you expect? And ,how would you feel.

Try asking him if he "ever hears from 'what's her name'?" This gives him an opening to tell you that he is chatting.