I know I want to leave this marriage, but he keeps telling me I'm wrong. Help!?

use a Roach Motel.

If it takes everything out of you to stay where your at then leave.

Its time to move on.

You are in an abusive relationship and you alone are responsible for letting him take advantage of you. The only solution you have now is take charge of your own life and do what is best for you and your kids. If you let him, he will simply get worse in the future. There are millions of single women out there and if they can make it, you can too. Reach out to friends and family members for support so that you can transition to a new life.

You are not being selfish. All you want to do is better your life along with your kids life. My mom was so happy after leaving my dad when i was8 and things were a lot better when he wasn't around as much. I use to see how sad my mom use to be with my dad and i didn't like it... Look < he is probably giving you that guilt trip because he is afraid of being a lone and no one is going to put up with his crap as much as you have. So don't feel bad, if you think its going to make you feel like a better person without him I say just leave him!!!!

You need to take the initiative and leave. Or at least give him a good scare. Go and get papers for divorce, even if you're not really going to leave. Sometimes a good scare works. If not, then really go through with it. You deserve to be happy in life, and yes, think of yourself. When someone is putting all the blame on you and can't blame their self for anything , then you know there is something wrong. He seems to be a procrastinator, and so that's why your house isn't getting finished. Just let him know you mean business whichever approach you are taking. you haven't left yet or made any serious moves, so he thinks you never will. Also, obviously if he isn't being a good dad, and you being unhappy can lead you to be an unhappy mom. And no matter how much you hide it, your kids can still see it. Your kids deserve to be happy, and having at least one good, happy parent can make a difference. Don't let this guy hold you back. Do what is right, and make yourself happy. He is the one only thinking of himself. Now you be selfish for once. You deserve it . Good luck Hun :-)

Its sad because of the kids. But it might be time to move on. Sounds like he feels guilty about something and in turn makes you feel that way to rid himself of his own guilt in an effort to feel better.

Sounds like things have got pretty rough. Could he be depressed? The fact that he is grumpy and unhappy, and doesn't want to be with the kids, and wont listen to your feelings, and hasn't finished work on the house sounds a bit like depression to me. If he is depressed, then this is not your fault, and he needs help. Men often wont admit that things are going wrong, because it is a sign of weakness.

Show you still care about him, however hard that sounds. You aren't being selfish, because you have needs too, and those needs are clearly not being met here, but obviously somehow neither are his. Something has come between you in this marriage, and you both need to sit down and figure out what this is. He could need counsel ling just for him, or maybe for both of you as a couple.

Marriages can very quickly go off track when one person is clinically depressed, especially when that hasn't been officially acknowledged or recognized. Don't give up just yet until you have worked out what the real problem is. After all, he can't have been like this when you married him. Something has changed, but that doesn't mean it can't be put right.

You are not selfish. You are a mother who needs a better life for her children and needs her husband to stand up, be a man, and put family first.

Men don't communicate the way we do. They need to have their ego lifted as well. They need to know that they are loved and appreciated. Not with words, but with what you do.

Jesus can fix this , too.

You are absolutely NOT being selfish. How can you consider it selfish when you should always want the best for you and your children and it sounds to me like this guy is by no means "the best". I am not saying that you should jump right into a divorce but maybe its time to lay down some ultimatums. Say "Fix my house, Treat me and our kids right, and show me some respect, or we're outta here period." If he loves you and wants to make it work with you, he'll clean up his act, if he doesn't clean up his act, then hes not worth your time anyway. I know you love him, but you have to think of whats best for you and your kids. You gotta love yourself enough to make a hard decision to better your life, and stop putting the ones who make your life worse first. Good luck, Happy Holidays.

Move on now, It won't get better later.

First of all you have to think about your kids and their happiness. if your not happy they see and feel it. Your kids need to be taken care of emotionally and if their dad is not there for them that can put a wall and distance between him and the kids. kids need time and attention just like everyone else does and time is something to you should not waste so if you truly feel that its time to move on then maybe you should.

Move on sweetie, life is hard enough without your relationship being even more of a burden. Your relationship should be the joy of your life and if it is not and you cannot see, away to get it back to a loving caring relationship that you want to be in then you have no choice but to leave and start over. No saying it is easy but it can be done.

I feel sad and sorry about your married life how it ends,it is unhealthy to stay in your marriage in that situation. that you two are no longer getting along and the two precious children suffers. Well ,if marriage counsel ling won't work,then the best solution is get a divorce,settlements, and move on.

Your absolutely not being selfish!

There is definitely a problem, you are carrying a lot of animosity for your husband, your situation, for unfulfilled expectations.
Both of you need more help than we can offer here.

If he won't agree to seeing a counselor, you go.

I won't advocate leaving. There was something that you loved 7 years ago and it probably still there. At the same time, he didn't turn into what he is today overnight. He was probably like he is from the start.

Well 7 years is a long time to be in a relationship....but if you have honestly tried to talk to him and get him to understand where your coming from and if you really do think leaving him is best for you than maybe that's the way to go ........But make sure you have considered everything first and that you do have a plan ...as to how to support your kids < BC like i said 7 years is alto and well it may be hard to just pick up and do it all yourself with out that oh er person with you> BUt anyhow..... if you really are sure that you dint want to be with him anymore then that's it .....whether he thinks its wrong or not your the only one who can honestly say whether its the right thing or not.....and what Im wondering if he is telling you your decision to leave is wrong ...what is he doing to prove that it is?




so if you really are ready to change things and maybe leave the nit would probably to be best to sit him down and let him know you have made a decision and you havent left any openings for opinions and your done trying to make osmething work that just isnt ...... let him talk but make sure he knows nothing he can say will effect your dicision......


and if you really arent sure whether to leave or not and perhaps thats the reason for the post maybe see if he might be interested in couples theraphy this way you two will be getting help and at the same time he will have that chance to prove to you that it is worth it to him and that he does want to try and or does care about what your feeling.


Good luck

No, you are not being too selfish..
Sounds like it is time for you to move on..
Make better choices in men next time around...

What a jerk...time for you to leave...and quick....