Marriage AdviceMarriage vows are powerful words that at times are hard to maintain. Many fear that marriage isn't the same commitment that it once was. Leave your fears at home and take a dose of marriage advice to help you maintain a committed relationship. Bring any questions or concerns regarding your death do you part.
I always knew I wanted to marry a good Christian man. When I first met my husband, he was anything but that. When he slowly began to change, and became a Christian, I fell in love with him. We were married a year later. It's been 3 1/2 years, and we have two beautiful children. In the past year and a half, he has become someone that I cannot even consider a friend. He lies to me, watches porn, makes fun of me when he's around his friends, gets drunk often, and listens to very satanic music. I have done everything I can to try to make this work, but I feel that I cannot make things better when he doesn't really want to change. He says he loves me and he will treat me better, but a few weeks go by, and it's back to the same ways. I know I love him, but my heart has become hard, and I have given up after so many failed attempts. I have become someone I don't want to be because of these problems, and I feel that it is affecting my faith and relationship with God. Advice please?
i will email you. because i dint feel like commenting on this when everyone will disagree with me
EDIT: the bible says to not be unequally yoked, and i know it says divorce isn't all that good but there are exceptions that would make it OK.
my dad was just like him but kinda worse. my mom held on for so long to keep us a family.
you said he does porn? that's also considered adultery. on a previous question hes suspicious of cheating, which is also adultery. and if he abuses you, then get away fast. if he's changing you then you need to leave. trust me. its best for you and your kids if you have any to get away. try marital counseling first though because he may change, but a lot of times they wont, i know its sad but its the truth. my dad wouldn't. my mom now is getting married to a wonderful Christian guy who treats her and me and my sister amazingly.
It's not sexual immorality or adultery if you divorce him for adultery.
Best advice is to seek Christian counseling for your support. Perhaps if he does love you he'll seek counseling with you, it may do him good to hear your concerns...
Also if you're in a good church there may be a men's group he can fellowship with, this may help also.
I've seen God...scratch that...Satan do this to many healthy marriages. It's all a test. My best advice is to hang in there. And trust Him. It'll all work out in good time.
i truly am sorry...one thing to remember is God is your best friend and your source for all things in life,it would be very difficult for me to try to advise you of what you should do but all i can tell you is what i would do and that is lay it on the line and backup what you say for me that is SHAPE UP OR SHIP OUT
Sweetheart, you are not the first person who has had to deal with this sort of situation. If your husband loves you and has not commit ed adultery then you have no grounds of divorce. If he has commit ed adultery then you have every right to divorce. Otherwise it is for richer or poorer in sickness and in health, for better or worse. I went through a very rocky time in my marriage (we all do) but I stuck it out and things do get better in time. Just keep on praying for him and you treat him with love and kindness. Love covers a multitude of sins.
I am so sorry this has happened to you. You sound like a good person with a good heart who only has great intentions. It sounds like he's changed back to his old ways, so do you think he ever really wanted to change in the first place? I don't want to sound negative, I just want you think about the truth...is he who he said he would be for you? Because if he's not, than he doesn't love you enough to be married to you. You deserve better than that! Do NOT blame it on yourself either, he's the one who would've been honest and said how he really felt in the first place. Email me if you wanna talk! Good luck and God BLESS.
don't let this stand in the way of you and god ,just give it to him and let him do to work for you just say to your self the lords pray and let it go .you will b alright in the end just keep the faith.
If you are a christian,and it sounds like you are,maybe GOD has hardened your heart in order to save you from danger.However,first you need to try one last time to save your marriage.Ask your husband to go and get counseling from a real pastor.Tell him that you cannot be unequally yoked.If he does not commit to changing,counseling and being a christian you need to leave.Trust me you will know if he is telling the truth-GOD will give you wisdom.Think of your kids and the bad influence he is having in their lives,if he does not truly change you are free to leave.,at least in my opinion.Ask GOD to give you wisdom and really listen.Oh,I will probably get thumbs down-It does not bother me-the truth matters most!GOD-bless
Talk to a marriage counselor, don't ask advice on a serious matter on yahoo. You will have too many people with different opinions flinging their ideas at you.
i am not a Christian but that does not make a person less than other. i just will state people dint really change until something terrible or wonderful happens to them. but my question to you is to you is what do want more to save your marriage or your relationship with god? from here you can proceed in your actions.
No one can tell you whether or not you should remain married to him or you should leave. Paul says that if you marry an unbeliever, and they are content to stay with you, you should not send them away. The "problem" with that -- and please don't thumbs down me for saying there's a "problem" with The Bible -- is that when women are in your situation, they neglect their relationship with God and put all of their effort into trying to change or reconnect with their husbands.
Regardless of whether you stay or you go, you need to start putting God first. Your husband might make fun of you, and he might even make it hard on you ... but a non-Christian man will grow tired of not being your number 1 priority, while with a Christian husband, you can put God first together. When your husband gets tired of coming in second place, he will either make a better effort or he will no longer be content to stay.
You are willing to give up your husband and ruin your children's lives for something non existent? Your husband looks at porn because something is lacking in his sex life. 'Satanic music' doesn't exist. Maybe if you get that big stick our of your butt and get some counseling, not religious counseling, you can save your marriage and not scar your children for life. Religious counseling will only push him away. I'm only trying to help your children. I am an elementary school teacher and I see children get so hurt when parents get divorced. Their grades slip, they have a hard time concentrating for a very long time and they tend to separate from their piers. It's very sad.
The reason your husband is being Soho ext rem in his sin is because when a person finds God, gets saved and then turns away they are wanting to go back to how it use to be before they were saved, but they can't because they are diff rent inside, they are changed, so when they go out into the world they become ext rem sinners trying to push God from their lives. If this situation is effecting your home life, and the lives of your kids it might be time to consider separation for awhile, maybe it will make him see what he is loosing if you put your words into action. I'm not saying divorce I'm saying taking your self and your children out of the situation and to a safer environment. You need to seek spiritual counseling, talk to a pastor or maybe the pastors wife, find a christian friend that will encourage you in your faith. First and for most you have to understand that you can't change him, and you can't let him steal your glory. The Lord loves you and he doesn't want to see this happen, but your gonna have to be the one to lead your family to Christ. Remember you salvation is a personal relationship not a couple relationship, you have to commit yourself to the Lord. Go to church every time the doors are open, pray and fast, read your Bible and instead of nagging your husband to go become cheerful in the Lord and just ask him. When he declines or makes fun of you no matter how it hurts go to church. Trust me I have been through a similar situation, not as bad but I understand were you are coming from. I've cry ed myself all the way to church and cry ed in my pastors arms. I've knelt down and prayed speaking in tongues to the Lord right in my bedroom while my husband sat in the other room not wanting me near him. It will get better, but you have to remebr no matter if he changes or not you need the Lord to help you through this. If divorce ends up being the only answer then the Lord will help you through that to. This is not your fault. You are amazing, God bless
He is in bondage and needs deliverance. Get Rebecca Brown's book, Unbroken Curses and follow her advice. You are in for a battle, but because you have the authority over demons you can get him set free. You are just going to have to stand up in the face of Satan and tell him to let your husband go. It will be a battle, but you will win and this man will be set free to be who is was meant to be in Jesus and a wonderful husband. I can understand how you are hardening your heart, you are in a self protective mode, but ask Jesus to break you free from that also. Once you are both free, you will be used in a mighty way within God's kingdom.
I wish I could give you good news but I really can't. I've been in your shoes and I fought for 16 years to make it work. We even went to a marriage counselor at the church and he behaved himself while he was on probation for domestic battery but it went back to the same old thing immediately. Yes, it eventually turned to abuse. I have 3 children raised in that situation and both the girls have ended up in the same abusive relationships because of what they saw. It made me into a person I hated and eventually I lost my friends because they couldn't deal with seeing me stay with him. The Bible teaches us to stay away from those who bring us to anger for anger is a sin. It also says that we can stay with an ungodly person and try to lead them to God or we have the choice to leave them if they reject Christianity. What your children are seeing in him is how they are learning to deal with relationships when they grow up. Is this going to lead your children down the wrong path? Yes it will. I didn't believe in divorce and felt he would someday change. In the end he attacked our 14 yr old daughter and threw her into glass he had shattered down the hallway in a drunken fit. It came to violence on the children before I woke up and I don't want that to happen to anyone else. That was 9 years ago and now I have a good christian man at my side who has helped my girls get out of the abusive relationships they were in and started them down the path their father should have. My son on the other hand, who is 19, will not hit a female under any circumstance and wants to find the one true love that will be by his side forever. They turned out to be good kids but it took a lot of hard work and determination. In the end he'll have to answer for what he has done and you do not want to be accountable for allowing your children to be raised like that. God has a plan for everyone and you have your 2 children out of it. They should be your main concern and let him go his own way. If he cares at all he will change but in the meantime you are hurting yourself and those wonderful children by being with him. Nothing is easy about it but turn it over to God, do what you need to and get those children in a better environment to grow. You are in my prayers to make you stronger. Good luck with whatever decision you make.
I need marriage advice from Christians.?
