New Relationship AdviceLove is in the air and it's the season for magic. There's not a set formula as we all may wish giving instructions on how to wed Prince Charming or Cinderella. Fortunately there's experienced individuals determined to see you living happily ever after in this forum.
I know that Y answers isn't the best place for advice, but sometimes strangers help more than loved ones. I'm so unhappy in my relationship, but I don't want to end it. We've been together for about 7 months, but she shows virtually no affection; furthermore, she seems so outgoing and fun around others but quiet and introverted around me. I asked her what I can do to be a better man, and she said that the thought of me brings a smile to her face and that she is happy. She says that meeting me was like angels coming down from heaven, but she NEVER shows love for me. She seems cold. Sometimes, I'll mention something in e-mail for instance about how I feel about her, and she won't respond. She'll act like I didn't even say it. She is so guarded. She has been hurt in the past and has a beautiful daughter. I've fallen in love with both her and her daughter. Her behavior pushes me away, and I'm insecure as it is. It just makes me feel more insecure. Advice?Her behavior makes my mind tick around her. I can't concentrate on little things like watching a movie with her. I just get lost in thought. It's just become a major problem, but I do love her. I've talked to her about the same issue twice now, but nothing has changed.
You sound like a sweet gentle soul, the kind of man any woman would be so blessed to have.Her behavior absolutely stems from being hurt in the past. We women often times find it difficult to get the pain out of our systems, out of our emotional/physical even spiritual systems.This then spills out into our relationships, and affects the ones we love. In fact, we want to love and may not even know a healthy way of loving.Please know that she needs help in dealing with her issues. For you to hang in there will take a lot of energy, and you have to be prepared and accept that this is for the long haul (if you love her).Help her seek help. This is the best thing you can do right now.However, keep in mind that her behavior will not change or may in fact worsen. It may come to a point where you have to walk away. Never lose yourself because you think you love someone. Love has nothing to do with losing oneself at the cost of another.
Your girlfriend is of the guarded type. Tread carefully with her. If you come on too strong or behave in a needy way this might reflect negatively in her eyes.My advice is to back off a bit and be cool. Sometimes, giving a little less attention will work in your favor.
She should be spending time with her daughter instead of going out. You are the one who needs to be taken care of yourself. You need to loves yourself first before you can love another. This sounds to me as you are letting her use you. You deserve better than her and that's the truth! Break free, my friend. You will find true love when you're not looking. Jesus loves you
Give her enough space. Sounds like you haven't. This women has been honest with you. You could mess her up with your insecurity. Please slow down and smell the roses.