Sex AdviceOne of the most sacred gifts we can share is that of Sex. Making love is one of the areas in life that is touchy to talk about, so we have derived a section specifically for sex questions. Do not be shy, for you shall not be judged for how you use your gift.
the other day my boyfriend and i were having a conversation and he told me he was frustrated because he cant seem to get me off . I am easily distracted and scared since Ive never done that before its embarrassing because I'm 20yrs old. Im scared this will become a problem with me and him.
The simplest thing to do is for you to go on top, at least for a good portion of the time. This does two things: keeps you actively involved, and puts you at the perfect angle for stimulation.
.................screech, anyway....
either get on top and grind into him or buy a vibrator and use it while hes in you.
and what are u embarrassed for? screw what he thinks of you while your getting into it....the only thing your doing right now is turning him off with all that shyness!
force yourself once to be really sexual, controlling and passionate in bed. you ll never feel shy again.
trust me, you have nothing to feel embarrassed for...with sex threes nothing you can really do that will ever make the man feel you need to be embarrassed for CZ hes gonna love anything you do up in that bed.
To be completely honest, you need to be all by yourself and masturbate. Seriously. You need to feel comfortable with yourself feel your body all over and think about what turns you on. Think about what you would like your guy to do to you. Think about things he did that made you go that was hot. Until you do you won't be comfortable with anyone. This will be a problem for any man you go with because getting you off is just as important to them as getting themselves off. However, if a guy could care or less, he's a loser and selfish to his needs only so dump anybody like that. You are easily distracted because your nervous and embarrassed and that's completely understandable. Also, you don't fully trust yourself with this guy and you don't know your sexual needs enough to fill him in on what he needs to do for you. Sex is total team work. You have to work together and communicate or it's going to suck for both of you. Leaving you both with hurt feelings. It really stresses out a man who can't get his woman off. It's also very stressful for someone who doesn't know what they want either. Seriously, take a deep breath and get to work on yourself. Hope this helps.
The ugly truth is that we as men want to make women orgasm because we want to be the best you've ever had. Every woman is different when it comes to what gets her off, but I can say that I've never had a problem giving a girl an orgasm by hugging her tight and grinding my pelvis into her cl it using slow to medium thrusts. Dirty talking is good too, such as telling her that I'm going to bust inside her. It doesn't matter if you're really going to do what you say, it just matters you make it believable. It's stimulating.
Don't worry, i makes it harder, you have to relax. He has to tease you, it, more, called foreplay, and take the time to figure out what the best recipe brings you to that point. Try different things. If he wants it he has to work at it a little different. It is a involuntary reaction to pleasure at that spot, you can't force it to happen, he has to tickle it to happen.
Relax! you are so nervous. That's why even if he tries a lot to help you explode, he couldn't, you are so tense. And some practice may help, because you would learn your right spots, and he may learn them too. But really just try to let you flow into love by him
You are probably getting his nervous, insecure vibe. Tell him to read a book called "She Comes First", about oral sex techniques for him to use on you (look it up on Amazon). You guys could read the different chapters to each other. You will learn something, and probably get in the mood in the process!
Also, don't be ashamed or intimidated by toys. There is a little vibrator called the "Rabbit" that many women swear by (also on Amazon, I bet). You can use it on your cl it, while he is focusing on your hole. Pardon me if that is too graphic for you, but I am just trying to express that it does not have to be a problem. The worst thing is to be ashamed and not talk about it.
Make sure you guys take your time. It's not about how hard he tries to stimulate you, or how fast he rubs you. Whenever he feels like taking it to the next step, just stay where you are for a little while longer, and give the anticipation a chance to build. I'm sure that's 99% of it.
It's perfectly normal for young and inexperienced women to have difficulty reaching orgasm or to not experience it at all. Not having had an orgasm yet is nothing to be embarrassed about. Even many older and more experienced women don't have orgasms very easily.
Is not having an orgasm a problem for you? If you're having fulfilling sex without an orgasm, then it's not a problem for you, and it shouldn't be for your boyfriend. He is putting unnecessary pressure on both himself and you. Tell your boyfriend that the glass is mostly full- the two of you connect emotionally during sex, you're enjoying yourself, and he enjoys the feeling of ejaculation a great deal.